My sister

Once upon a time there was a girl named Lisa. She was a nice girl. Lots and lots of people liked her. One day she was walking down the street just whistling a nice non-denominational tune she had picked up while going to Dragon Fest. It had an Indigo Girls-esque sound to it, but was something that she also might have once heard while watching an episode of Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. Anyway--not a care in the world, Lisa was not paying attention to where she was going when she stumbled on a crack in the sidewalk and fell! OH NO! But wait, it gets worse...hard to believe I know that something so tragic could happen to such a wonderful person. Indeed, my heart aches in relating the tale to you. Still--I must. What you don't know is that Lisa fell immediately in front of a store filled with fine home furnishings. In the front display window was a lovely sofa with two adorable children sitting on it. (Their names were Susie and Jack but that is irrelevant to this particular tale...) To Lisa's utter and complete horror as she looked up into their angelic faces, a GIANT PIT BULL jumped over the back of the sofa and ate them up. The end.